The Good News and The Bad News
So, the good news I said I'd be able to share this week is that I interviewed for my own job and I get to keep it! Our department is reorganizing and, to be fair, everyone got to throw their name in the hat for any of the jobs they thought they'd like to do. If our job title was changing (mine FINALLY changed to what I'm actually doing), we had to interview. Last week, I was called a Senior Product Performance Analyst (even though I haven't been analyzing product performance for nearly two years). This week, I am a Senior Technical Writer with a new manager and a new partner on our two person team. I am excited and a little concerned for what the future will bring. Our "team" was supposed to consist of four people but due to budget constraints was slimmed down to only two. I have faith that things will work out.
On to the bad news - I had a mild panic attack while at dog training class with Rags on Wednesday night but there is also good news - I used some of the tips I got from the self help books I've been reading and I was able to get through the attack without any Xanax.
Then, I returned to work on Thursday after my regularly scheduled day off. I had a lot of low-level anxiety while preparing for work and while driving there. When I got there, I started to panic again. Writing this, I feel like such a loon. And such a weakling. And such a freak. And such a failure. I took two Xanax and the rest of the day went swimmingly. My next plan of attack is to take a couple days off of work to let my parasympathetic nervous system calm down for a bit. I got up this morning, got the kids ready, dropped them off at daycare and came back home, plopped into bed and slept for two more hours. Now I'm going to do whatever I want for the rest of the day!! :) I have a doctor's appointment next Thursday and also took next Monday off to do WHATEVER I WANT for the whole day. I am praying that I will be back to my old Nervous-Nelly-but-non-panicking self by next Tuesday.
Also good news is that Max, Ryann, and Adam have no idea that any of this is going on. Their little lives are humming along so wonderfully normally; thank goodness for them. The three constant wondrous (and sometimes nerve-wracking) things in my life.
On to the bad news - I had a mild panic attack while at dog training class with Rags on Wednesday night but there is also good news - I used some of the tips I got from the self help books I've been reading and I was able to get through the attack without any Xanax.
Then, I returned to work on Thursday after my regularly scheduled day off. I had a lot of low-level anxiety while preparing for work and while driving there. When I got there, I started to panic again. Writing this, I feel like such a loon. And such a weakling. And such a freak. And such a failure. I took two Xanax and the rest of the day went swimmingly. My next plan of attack is to take a couple days off of work to let my parasympathetic nervous system calm down for a bit. I got up this morning, got the kids ready, dropped them off at daycare and came back home, plopped into bed and slept for two more hours. Now I'm going to do whatever I want for the rest of the day!! :) I have a doctor's appointment next Thursday and also took next Monday off to do WHATEVER I WANT for the whole day. I am praying that I will be back to my old Nervous-Nelly-but-non-panicking self by next Tuesday.
Also good news is that Max, Ryann, and Adam have no idea that any of this is going on. Their little lives are humming along so wonderfully normally; thank goodness for them. The three constant wondrous (and sometimes nerve-wracking) things in my life.
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